It’s not fun to blackout

It’s a simple formula.

As a child, you watch a sport, you begin to like a team, and you begin to like players on the aforementioned team, which leads you to wanting to see the team live and purchasing products with the team’s name on them. From there, you teach your children about the team (every single day if you idiotically marry a fan of a rival team), which gets them interested in the team and the tree of sports continues to grow.

This is the story of sports and the spreading of sports.

Blacking out games is a chainsaw to the sports tree.

Any Chicagoan (yes, all life lessons come back to Chicago), in their 20s or early 30s are prime examples of what blacking out a sport can do.

Bill Wirtz was the owner of Chicago Blackhawks for 41 years. He was known as “Dollar Bill” Wirtz thanks to his enjoyment of keeping money in his pocket.

Wirtz was blamed for allowing Bobby Hull to leave the Hawks along with the loss of Dominik Hasek, Ed Belfour and trading Denis Savard, Chris Chelios, Jeremy Roenick and Phil Esposito.

Wirtz was a huge reason for the Blackhawks’ owning the second longest championship drought in NHL history and longest in team history. In 2004, the Chicago Blackhawks were named the worst franchise in all of sports and in 2002 Wirtz was named the third greediest owner in all of sports.

Aside from trading hall of fame talent and causing hockey stars to never want any association with the Blackhawks, Wirtz was and never should be forgiven for forbidding Blackhawks home games to be shown on TV unless they were picked up by national broadcasters, which only happened when the Blackhawks made the playoffs.

He actually tried to explain the nonsense by saying broadcasting regular home games was unfair to season-ticket holders.

Wirtz even tried to start Hawkvision, a pay-per-view service, which cost $29.95 a month during the 1992 and 1993 seasons for Blackhawks home games.

Thanks to this, my generation did not grow up with hockey in what was once considered a hockey town. Only now, after Bill Wirtz died and his son took over and changed everything, has hockey come back to life in Chicago.

Blackhawk jerseys are now seen everywhere in Chicago and the generation behind me had a chance to understand and love hockey.

Now onto the Vikings. The attempt to attach a bill forbidding blackouts to the stadium bill was a pipe dream, but was commendable. Considering the taxpayers are paying for this new stadium, shouldn’t they be guaranteed a chance to watch their team play in it, regardless of who shows up?

The idea of blacking out a game if it did not sell out within 72 hours was introduced in 1973. Vikings don’t have too much to worry about, considering they have sold out 144 consecutive games and have not been blacked out since 1997.

The blackout, however, is a slippery slope. It’s basically a league scolding fans for not showing up to see what the fans feel is a bad product. The NFL could care less about the little kid wanting to watch his newfound favorite player from his living room.

Let the kid watch his team. Let him enjoy sports now before he gets older and all he reads about is arrests, steroids and basically anything associated with the NCAA.

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The NFL draft is out of control

The NFL draft has simply lost its mind. It’s too long, too loud and too obnoxious.

It’s bad enough the sporting world must choke down the NFL year-round via the NFL Lives of the world, but now we have a three-day footballapalooza breaking down players we may never hear from again. I’d rather turn off sports and watch NASCAR than hear how a tall player is “long,” how a good wide receiver has “soft hands,” how an offensive lineman has “quick feet,” how a quarterback has “football sense,” how a running back is “elusive” or have Jon Gruden idiotically inform me of just how much of a “football player” each athlete, who literally just got selected to be paid to play football, actually is.

I also can do without New York Jets’ fans booing any pick the Jets take, along with offensive linemen never receiving any kind of reaction because no one at the draft knows who they are.

Give us a breather from the season and perhaps the NFL draft would justify taking three days, but that is not the case.

We’re told the NFL is the biggest and most followed sport in the country, which is true. Baseball may be the country’s love, but football is the country’s blood. But why is that?

Could it be because no sport is easier to be called a “fan” of than the NFL? Dedicate three hours a week, learn the coach and quarterback’s name and you are suddenly a diehard NFL fan.

Here is every call in it to a radio show regarding the NFL:

“Boy, I can’t stand (insert quarterback or coach’s name here). They should bring back (insert old quarterback or coach’s name here).”

The NFL draft is too loud and too obnoxious because it plays to its audience. There is no worse following than the NFL following (cue comments with the word “passionate” in them).

Of course there are many intelligent NFL fans, but, as a whole, the general population of fans is just looking for something to talk about at the water cooler the next morning. We’ve all had the awkward conversation with a fellow football “fan” where you know the person doesn’t know what they’re talking about (usually they will say things like “Yeah, but he’s a winner” or talk about trading the quarterback of his team referring to the team as “we” and incorrectly pronouncing the name of the quarterback) and you can either choose the high road and kind of agree or start an argument. It isn’t enjoyable.

In order to talk about a football team, you should have to name three offensive linemen on the team. Unfortunately, since that is not the case, we will continue to have things such as the judgement of quarterbacks solely by looking at interceptions rather than wide receivers, offensive linemen and coaching and things of that nature because the dumber fans always look for the easiest answers rather than the correct ones.

And the dumb fans are always right because they are louder and there are more of them.

With irritating things such as the NFL draft, the NFL is making it easy to hate the NFL.

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NHL playoffs: Things could get itchy

There’s just something about dynamite facial hair every man respects. Women don’t understand it, and there’s no real reason behind it.

It’s like the popularity of the television show “Glee.” It’s baffling and impossible to explain, but it just is.

Yet another reason why hockey players are the coolest athletes on the planet is the playoff beard. Originated in the 1980s by the New York Islanders, due to playing a handful of games on consecutive nights and not finding time to shave during the playoffs, the idea of the playoff beard is to not shave until your team is eliminated from the playoffs.

Some NHL players have said it’s a reminder when they look in the mirror in the morning of the job they have to do.

As someone whose had decision-making power for less than six months and has already written two stories about playoff beards (SWC’s Zach Huisken and Edgerton/Ellsworth’s Devin Hulstein), it’s safe to say I enjoy the idea.

No man respects facial hair more than the man who can’t grow it. I am that man.

Outside of the fur trail from sideburns to neck where hair gathers for a party, along with some whiskers on the cheeks and under the nose, there’s nothing enjoyable about me not shaving. It was disgusting just writing the previous sentence, let alone living it.

I will say proudly, however, I once ignored the knowledge that not shaving would only create broken roads of hair on my face. I knew it would bring about ridicule and horrible stares from friends, family and strangers.

As a high school sports reporter at the time, I knew parents of athletes would wonder what the fuzzy creature interviewing their son and/or daughter was doing. I knew being face to face with high schoolers who had more prominent facial hair than me would cause me to die a little inside. Considering I covered girls’ badminton (yes, girls’ badminton) during my shaveless streak, I knew there was a good chance the authorities would be called when I attended matches.

It was bold. It was difficult. It was itchy. A badminton player said to me, “Oh, great. I get to get interviewed by the homeless reporter.” My own mother laughed at me and said, “I just don’t understand why it doesn’t reach your chin. No woman will ever love you when you look like that.”

It was a grueling experience.

But I did it. From April 16 until June 9 of 2010, a razor did not touch my face, culminating with the Chicago Blackhawks winning their first Stanley Cup since 1961.

It has now been six days since I’ve shaved and I shall continue allowing my face to be a mockery (insert “It is without facial hair” comment here) until the Blackhawks are eliminated.

Please, parents of high school athletes, do not call the police on the fuzzy guy with the pen, paper and giant camera at your son and/or daughter’s athletic events. People with neck beards have feelings, too. No souls, but we do have feelings.

I encourage you to join in the glory of the playoff beard. I forgot. It requires having a team actually in the playoffs. Sorry, Minnesota.

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How the Twins can win the World Series

They probably can’t…OK, next topic.

The Minnesota Twins have won with less, so there is hope, Minnesota. A lot of things need to go right, but it’s possible if:

M&M don’t melt

Justin Morneau and Joe Mauer need time machines. Everything starts and stops with these two. Last season, the former MVPs combined to miss 173 games and the Twins had no chance. In the six seasons Mauer has played in more than 100 games the Twins are 527-368 with three playoff appearances.

Supporting cast stays healthy

Denard Span missed games thanks to a concussion, Jamey Carroll is 37 years old, Ryan Doumit played in 77 games last season, and Alexi Casilla hasn’t played in more than 98 games in a season, but that’s not because of health; it’s because he isn’t good. Put these guys around a healthy Morneau and Mauer, and the Twins are a different team.

Liriano shows up

Liriano is quickly becoming the Edwin Jackson/Javier Vazquez-esque pitcher, who shows they can dominate, but never stays consistent. A 5.09 ERA is not going to cut it for a guy the Twins hoped would replace Johan Santana. Liriano has to be the No. 1 because Carl Pavano is not and Scott Baker (3.14 ERA last season and just hit the DL) is a solid No. 2 or No. 3 at best. With Nick Blackburn and Jason Marquis (sent to the minors) at the end of the rotation, there could be a lot of 4.00 ERAs for the Twins starting staff.

Twins need surprises

Home runs do not come easy in Oakland, but Josh Willingham hit 29, 15 of which were at the Coliseum. Willingham surprised last season, but just got paid and is 33. Danny Valencia has the ability to hit 20 home runs, but his on-base percentage can’t dip as low as it did last season (.294). Matt Capps (his ERA jumped 1.78 points from 2010 to 2011) and Glen Perkins have to surprise in the bullpen because the Twins have no one else. With Baker on the DL and Marquis not being good, Liam Hendricks will have to be solid to give the Twins an actual rotation.

My predictions

AL East goes to the Red Sox, AL Central goes to the Tigers, AL West goes to the Angels, and wildcards (yes, wildcards) go to Yankees and Rangers. Yankees beat Rangers in one game playoff, Red Sox beat Yankees with ESPN dedicating 30 minutes of SportsCenter to each game, and Angels beat Tigers in ALDS. Red Sox beat Angels in ALCS.

In the NL, NL East goes to the Phillies, NL Central goes to the Reds, NL West goes to the Giants and wildcards go to the Marlins and Diamondbacks. Marlins beat Diamondbacks in wildcard playoff, Phillies beat Marlins, and Giants beat Reds in NLDS. Phillies beat Giants in NLDS.

Red Sox beat Phillies in World Series. If you’ll excuse me, I have to throw up because of that prediction.

At least we’re done with dirty college sports and can move on to steroids

Congratulations to Kentucky Wildcats coach John Calipari. You didn’t stop when the NCAA took away your Final Four season with UMass because Marcus Camby accepted $28,000 from two sports agents. You didn’t stop when the NCAA took away your national championship run with Memphis when Derrick Rose’s SAT score was invalidated.

You didn’t stop because only in college sports is winning more important than the rules of the sporting gods and is a place where the dirty car salesman is king. Thanks to this, you were able to poach on a big-name program that was so tired of losing (money and wins), it was willing to give away its soul, along with $31.65 million, just to win. You’re proof your win-loss record is the only record that matters in the NCAA.

Enjoy this championship, Mr. Calipari, because I can’t imagine you’re going to get to keep it.

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You’re welcome, area teams

It would seem as though the city slicker from Chicago with the radical ideas, smart mouth, odd accent, perplexing attitude about driving over 20 miles per hour and the workings of a four-way stop and strange (correct) sporting opinions has brought the area of small(er) towns some good luck.

I don’t enjoy tooting my own horn, mainly because I don’t own a horn, but, considering the amount of criticism this job entails on a day-to-day basis, I’m blasting my air horn. Toot. Toot.

I entered the beautiful city of Worthington on Nov. 4 and before I even had time to figure out the legends were true about KFC buffets, Edgerton/Ellsworth was celebrating a state championship in football. Next, Jackson County Central went on to win a state championship in wrestling. Worthington’s girls’ basketball team followed with a trip to the state tournament, but not before WHS’s boys’ hockey team won back-to-back games for the first time since the 2007 season and the girls’ team did the same for the first time in a long time (six or seven years I was told).

Soon after the Trojans’ girls’ basketball team punched their ticket to state, the boys’ basketball team did the same for Worthington. It marked the first time both the girls’ and boys’ basketball teams qualified for state in the same season. Joining the Trojan boys at state were Southwest Christian and Mountain Lake/Butterfield-Odin.

Did I mention it was the first time ML/B-O made state since the schools paired up in 1988? Well, it was. The Wolverines finished fourth and the Eagles finished second in the state in Class A.

I’ll even throw in the Minnesota West Bluejays knocking off the No. 1-ranked team in the country in hoops, while this sports editor was in office, as a reason to toot my horn.

We may disagree on many things, my beloved reader, but you have to give the city boy some credit. Teams enjoy winning under my watch.

In all seriousness, I thank you, area teams, for giving me stuff to put in the paper. You will never see sports at their purest than prep sports. No money, no scholarships, just pride. It’s a beautiful thing. To see them succeed has been a privilege and working in the office until 2 a.m. some nights with the cheesy idea the athletes will hold on to the paper I made filled with their success for years to come is the reason I walk into work every day.

Now if I could only figure out a way to bring some luck to your pro teams…I wouldn’t.

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College cheating: The victimless crime

According to a statement from the NCAA, the University of North Carolina football program was punished Monday for the following:

1. University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, is responsible for multiple violations, including academic fraud, impermissible agent benefits, ineligible participation and a failure to monitor its football program.

 
2. Over the course of three seasons, six football student-athletes competed while ineligible as a result of these violations, and multiple student-athletes received impermissible benefits totaling more than $31,000.

 
3. While employed by the university, a former assistant football coach [John Blake] was compensated by a sports agent [Gary Wichard] for the access he provided to student-athletes and failed to disclose the income to the university. The former assistant coach and a former tutor [Wiley] both committed unethical conduct and failed to cooperate with the investigation.

 
UNC has to forfeit 15 scholarships over the next three seasons, will not be bowl eligible in 2012, receives three years probation, a $50,000 fine, loses all wins from 2008 and 2009, multiple players cannot be associated with the program, including former UNC wideout Hakeem Nicks, and Blake is banned from all recruiting activities in college football for three years

 
Blah. Blah. Blah.

 
It’s March Madness, but college athletics are the only maddening thing.

 
So because of past indiscretions, the future athletes at the University of North Carolina will be punished?

 
It’s nearly as backward as the BCS system or the fact human beings decide the road teams have to take to win the national championship in basketball (Surprise, surprise. Duke gets yet another cakewalk to the Elite 8).

 
College sports are amazingly entertaining, but the people who think they are more pure than professional sports are out of their minds.

 
As for the madness, it’s going to be Duke, Michigan State, Kansas and Syracuse…and I do see the irony in tearing college sports apart and filling out a bracket.

 
It’s almost as ironic as calling players on college teams “student athletes.”

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Has to be said: March Madness is no excuse for adults to act crazy

It never fails. There’s always one. A voice that rises above the others like a bird ruining a night’s perfectly sweet slumber.

Show me a field, arena or court featuring prep sports and I will show you a “fan” who believes the louder they are, the more reasonable they sound. The sad thing is the worst of these “fans” are not the teenagers in the student section — who have puberty as a perfect excuse to be obnoxious, but choose to be hilariously entertaining instead — but rather the so-called “adults” in the stands who are supposed to be supporting the athletes.

I’ve seen kids have to hold their parents back from trying to fight coaches. I’ve seen refs followed to their cars by people who are supposed to be role models. I’ve been on the field and seen athletes’ heads weighed down by embarrassment.

To the shouters, yellers, complainers and whiners, as someone who is on the court, let me be the first to burst your bubble and inform you that refs can’t understand what you’re saying from up there and coaches ignore your demands. The only ones who hear exactly what you’re saying are the ones who could recognize your voice in a sea of millions: the kids playing.

Perhaps if you weren’t too busy yelling at coaches or referees, you’d notice the players shaking their heads in embarrassment.

Let me save you some time. No, I’m not telling you how to raise your kids. No, I don’t have kids of my own. Yes, I’ve attended prep games featuring people I dearly love. Yes, I’ve seen incorrect calls or suspicious coaching calls. No, I’ve never felt the need to yell from the stands at a referee or coach. I feel bad enough having the job of interviewing high school coaches after a loss.

There’s nothing easier than yelling about something you don’t fully understand. A coach knows his or her team better than you do. Just as you are too far away in the stands for a referee to hear exactly what you said, you are too far away to see what a referee sees.

We tell these kids to have fun and remind them it’s just a game, but then we act as though there is nothing more important?

Either pick up a clipboard or a whistle or sit down and cheer for your team. Then, win or lose, you tell whatever athlete you came to see how well they did.

The life of an athlete is a road of letdowns with the occasional heavenly spotlight. The last thing they need letting them down are relatives in the stands.

While they are on the court, let’s allow the players to be the main attraction.

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Oops: ESPN’s bad headLINe

Before you read the story and follow it through the newspaper, there is the headline. It’s those words which are meant to punch the reader in the face and say, “Read this.” It’s a small space from which to describe what a 300 or 3,000-word story speaks about and the description must be quick and clever, but not too cute.

It is the reason I have 30 ways of saying a team lost or won (beat, defeat, fell to, dropped, throttle, edge, cruised by…etc). It’s really sad how excited I get when I think of a different way to say a team won or lost.

It’s one of the most irritating jobs of an editor, but also one of the most important. It is one thing (there are plenty) you can count on having a call, a copy of the newspaper with a giant red mark and a few e-mails the next day waiting for you if there is a mistake, considering the mistake could change history (see the “Dewey Defeats Truman” headline that was in the Nov. 3, 1948, issue of the Chicago Tribune).

Aside from our ability to devilishly dance with words, journalists are human. We eat, drink and sometimes we even sleep. When you’re looking at thousands of words a day, some just escape you; even the big ones.

I’ve woken up in the middle of the night thanks to nightmares of incorrect headlines, as if I were having war flashbacks. Sometimes the nightmares come true (I wholeheartedly apologize for putting JCC’s Whitney Burmeister on Windom’s basketball team in a headline).

All you can do is say, “I knew that didn’t look right,” and proceed to yell, throw and/or punch something to relieve the anger and never forget it.

It’s usually impossible to forget if you have loyal friends in the newsroom to consistently remind you of and belittle you for your mistakes. We’ll call mine A. Hagen and J. Froemming. That’s too obvious. Let’s call them Aaron H. and Joe F.

ESPN recently wrote a headline involving a phrase used to describe when a fault is found in someone, but also includes a word often used as racial slur for Asian people in regards to a story about New York Knicks’ guard Jeremy Lin, who is of Chinese and Taiwanese decent.

It was taken down 35 minutes after being posted, editor Anthony Federico was fired and anchor Max Bretos was suspended 30 days for saying it on air, even though his wife is Asian.

It was Federico’s last headline of the night, posted at 2:30 a.m. I’m sure he didn’t get much sleep that night.

It was an inexcusable mistake which will ironically point the spotlight on those of whom are normally directing it.

It’s a mistake and we should assume it was only that. Making a racial remark is probably not worth being fired from the center stage of sports journalism.

Always remember, people, to re-read everything. And, after that, re-read it again.

There are things the all-powerful spellcheck simply can’t see.

As we speak, I just realized I had Murray County Central as the Huskies in my headline rather than the Rebels.

I can sleep knowing I changed it before deadline, but I’ll certainly be waking up in the middle of the night thinking I didn’t.

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Josh Hamilton cracked corn and I don’t care

So Texas Rangers centerfielder Josh Hamilton had three to four beers recently and relapsed, since last relapsing in 2009, after being sober since 2005, after the former No. 1 pick was forced to miss the entire 2003, 2004 and 2005 seasons because of suspensions for drug and alcohol use in the Tampa Bay organization.

Get all that?

The real question is why do we care?

If you’re in the Rangers organization, it’s a tad irritating that you’ve spent money on babysitters to keep this guy focused and he brings this news. Then again, considering Hamilton is a free agent after this season, people in the Rangers organization could hold this over his head as to why they won’t give him the contract he wants.

Regardless, outside of the Rangers organization and the Tampa Bay organization — who should never forgive Hamilton — the only reason the sports world cares about this relapse is because we put too much focus on the bad guys who go good for a brief stint, rather than the good guys who have always been good (see Jim Thome).

Everyone loves the feel-good story about someone climbing back to the top from the bottom, but at the same time, why do we, as sports fans, give these guys more credit than the guys who’ve never done anything wrong?

Why do we hate guys like Jay Cutler because they seem like jerks, but cheer for guys like Michael Vick or Hamilton because they did terrible things and are trying to make up for their actions after getting in trouble for them?

Would they have stopped if they hadn’t been caught?

What did Hamilton and Vick really do to earn back our trust as sports fans? They performed well at the job they weren’t able to do thanks to their negative actions.

Let Hamilton have a couple beers if he wants to. Don’t get angry because you and the media put him on a pedestal.

Talk to me when he’s not doing his job or doing something morally wrong because of those couple of beers.

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OK, I’ll ask: Do the Patriots deserve to be in the Super Bowl and does the NL deserve a World Series representative?

So often we are given an idea or a rule and we just accept it, rather than question the hand giving it to us.

“Tradition” or “that’s the way it’s always been” is the worst reasoning for anything in life.
Old doesn’t mean good. Sorry, Baby Boomers, who jam “classic” rock music down our throats, but it’s true.

In sports, the traditional excuses are used way too often.

Faulty playoff systems are put in place with undeserving teams winning championships and we simply accept it because that’s the way it is. Rules, which simply don’t make sense, are enforced and we carry on and say, “What can you do?”

Well, you can question these rules and wonder if the outcome of a season is justified rather than just accept it.

My first question is: Did the New England Patriots deserve to defeat the Baltimore Ravens?

In the AFC Championship, there were 30 seconds remaining in the game and the Ravens were down by three. Ravens quarterback Joe Flacco found wide receiver Lee Evans in the end zone for what appeared to be a touchdown catch.

Evans caught the ball, got one foot down and appeared to get his second down just as Patriots cornerback Sterling Moore came from behind and knocked the ball loose.

Whether Evans’ second foot got down before Moore jarred the ball loose is not the question. The question is why does someone running toward the end zone just have to break the goal line with the ball, but a receiver needs to catch the ball, get two feet in and “make a football move” to declare a play a catch in the end zone?

Evans had the ball in the middle of the end zone far past the goal line. How much time does a defender have in the end zone to make a play? If a running back reaches with the ball toward the end zone, breaks the goal line and the ball gets swatted out of his hands, it’s still a touchdown, so why does a receiver have to “make a football move” in order for a catch to be a touchdown?

This doesn’t take away from the heads-up play by Moore, but it does call into question the NFL rule. Unfortunately, these rules are only questioned when they may have cost a team.
And, perhaps, I’m just mad that we now have a Super Bowl between two fan bases that feel the rest of the world starts and stops on everything its teams do thanks to Eastern Seaboard Programming Network (ESPN).

So ESPN is going to talk about New York and a Boston-area team over and over again? Must be a rerun.

My second sports-related question: With Albert Pujols and Prince Fielder now in the American League, does the National League deserve a World Series representative?

Quick. Name five star hitters in the National League. Not that easy, right?

For far too long, the National League has been allowing mediocre to bad teams to enter the playoffs in MLB.

And seeing as a team just has to go 11-8 in the faulty MLB playoff system, we end up with champions such as the 83-win St. Louis Cardinals in 2006, the Philadelphia Phillies, who had Cole Hamels, Brett Meyers and Jamie Moyer as their No. 1, No. 2 and No. 3 starters in 2008, the 2010 San Francisco Giants, who had Aubrey Huff as their best hitter, and last season’s St. Louis Cardinals of whom I bet you can’t name five players outside of Albert Pujols.

These teams are not champions. They aren’t even close. In most cases, every American League team in the playoffs was better than the NL team that made the World Series and in some cases, the World Series champions don’t even deserve to be in the playoffs. Once you make the World Series, you just need to win four games out of seven versus an AL team that just had to play the best teams in baseball and you’re dubbed world champs.

Talent changing hands is usually cyclical, but this is getting outrageous, especially with Pujols and Fielder changing leagues and the reigning NL MVP possibly being suspended for 50 games. The difference between the leagues just went from not even close to not the same sport.

Since 2005, the AL has a 979-785 record in interleague play. 2012 may not be the end of the world, but it looks like it could be the end of relevance in the National League. And, yet, it still gets a representative in the World Series and, thanks to an idiotic rule, perhaps even home field advantage in it.

The best way to do things would be one giant league where the top eight teams make the playoffs, but that would take away division rivalries, which means ticket prices couldn’t be raised for those games.

With the added wildcard team possibly happening this season, we could see a team under .500 headed to the playoffs in the NL. A 12-8 record over three weeks later and you have yourselves another undeserving champion.

And that’s just the way it is, but that doesn’t mean it’s right.

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